I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
