I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I'm always down for nudity.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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