Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize