Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize