Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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