I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
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