This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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