Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
