Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
