im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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