oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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