I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
We are two peas in an std pod
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
