Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize