he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
