My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
