ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
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