Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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