Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
