Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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