dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
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