you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
you inspire me to be a worse person
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
