it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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