I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
So squirting runs in the family.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
