i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
