So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
