There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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