its not stalking. its research.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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