How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
