it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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