If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
