i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
