Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
