is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
