he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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