It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
