did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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