Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
