i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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