Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize