I feel like abortions should bother me more
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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