You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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