We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Acid is not a monday night drug
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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