Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize