South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
