I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
