White coat. Heels.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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