i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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