cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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