i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
