She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
only you would photoshop your dick
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
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