when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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